Saturday, October 1, 2011

The beauty of being (lost)

Where there is a valley, there will be a river. Where there is a river, there will be a sandbar. Where there is a sandbar, there will be fish in the river. Where there are fish, there will be boys pursuing them. And, in this way, boys have forever become lost in a moment of adventure and excitement and belief that this Earth was made for them alone. This photograph is a reflection of the way it was Friday afternoon in the Minnesota River Valley. Count the fisherboys. How many do you see? Or think you see?

A river runs through it

If you were to drop me off in the middle of a wilderness, woodland or desert, a few days later I would walk out wearing a smile and weighing few pounds more than I did when you dropped me off. (If you actually decide to do it to me, please, remember that I would prefer woodlands.)

But, if you placed me in the center of a town much larger than two blocks square, I probably would be lost within five or ten minutes.

One is my strength and the other is my weakness. The first was partially learned, but, mostly, it came instinctually. The second is just that way it is for me and I can do nothing about it. In the first, I cannot become lost; in the second, I seemingly have no control over the situation.

You might have heard/read me say/write those words before.

These two characteristics seem to exist in the world of reality, but, in another sense, I can become lost in time anywhere from minutes to years. You probably can, too, in the manner of which I am writing about now. I can get lost in a song or in a number of songs on the radio. I can get lost in a book or in a series of books by a particular author. I can get lost in a job or in a woman or in an avocation or on a river journey in a canoe.

I have gotten lost in a dream, in a woman's eyes, in a storm on a big, big lake. I have gotten lost in Nirvana and while falling breathless in the white tunnel of death.

This week, I began unpacking a few boxes of the books I still tote around with me. It was symbolic of making a decision, I guess, to keep this house as "Firebase Fram" for a while. The reason I initially began unpacking the boxes, however, was because I was looking for a specific book, "The Lessons of History," by Will and Ariel Durant.

I have written at least two posts about that pair, and mentioned them briefly in other posts. They became lost, too, lost in each other and lost in the study of history. What I love most of them, in a romantic sense, is that she was about fifteen and he was about twenty-seven when they married. She roller skated to her wedding. They had some rough years, mostly because she was so very young, but they lasted until old age claimed them both -- they lasted, because they became lost in each other and in a mutual love, the study of history.

My intention had been to entirely reprint one of their enduring chapters of absolute wisdom from that book as a last post before retreating into the woodwork (note, woodwork, not woodlands) for a few weeks. But, although I have two copies of the book, I have not run across either one yet. So, that chapter will wait until another day to be reprinted here. The chapter I planned to use, incidentally, was about the "thin veneer of civilization." Civilization might be on the verge of collapse, I think.

So, instead, I decided to write a few paragraphs with my own words about the "thin veneer of reality." If you doubt that reality is thin, then, in the simplest sense, you have no imagination; or, in an abstract logic, you have lived a very sheltered life and never have accepted the fact that Mythago Wood and Neverland and Somewhere Over the Rainbow actually do exist. Dante Alighieri wrote about the nine circles of hell. Has it occurred to you there might be nine circles of earthly life? Probably not.

And, allow me to simply say here that I hope we all will become lost again and again -- hopefully, lost in the eyes of another. If not that, at least lost in a book or a dream or a vision of a dream yet to become a reality. Life really is wonderful for those who have the ability to become lost in it -- if only for a few hours or a few weeks at a time. Maybe, even just for a moment at a time.

As for myself, I am adrift in a canoe on a river where mist and fog shroud the approaching bend. If I seem to be rambling a bit, that is because it is my nature, too.

So-o-o-o-o, send me a smile, blow me a kiss, wave until I am out of sight .... I am about to become lost again. For a while, anyway. Possibly, never to return to reality. Good. It is about time. See you around. Maybe. If I am able to determine which reality is real.


Kaya said...

The beauty of being lost.... Fascinating title. I have to think about it. And I might to find some day beauty in being lost.

I think I am the same as you are Fram, I can be easily lost in the middle of big city. And I feel better in the mountains and forests and secluded places even sometimes I can't find my way back.

I think I understand what you meant when your wrote that you can be lost in writing or song your are listening to. The same with me and usually I am somewhere but not in reality. I think you have a beautiful imagination and very creative and that is great. I think it's a gift, Fram. Try not to loose it.

Aha, you found "The Lessons of History." Ok, I heard about this book and never read it. What a shame?

How many books I didn't read, Fram? Every evening I tell myself if I read before I will go to bed even for an hour I might become very intellectual person. And then I listen to the music.... Ok, not always.

I will send you.... Smile? Yes. A kiss.... Not sure. I will send you my warm wishes and a hug.

Love Franz Liszt Love Dream. Good, so good. Thanks for this music, Fram.

Greetings from Kaya.

Wind said...

Hello, Fram!
If I am not writing
it doesn't means that I am not here
listening to you or to your music.
About this wonderful, great, amazing 'Liebestraum' the 3rd.
It is called 'O Lieb', and it tells the sory of unconditional perfect love, starting and finishing with that peaceful sound of piano...In between a cascade of sounds, ups and downs like in life.
I like it very much!
I will be back, to read again your words, to understand better what you have said!
See you soon!
My best regards!

Kaya said...

Hello, Fram,

I wrote to you yesterday comment and it is gone. Is it something wrong with google or...?

It's strange. Please, let me know where is my comment?

Fram Actual said...

Yes, Wind, I know you come and go as the sun and the moon and the stars come and go.

And, you know much more than I do about this music, this song, "Liebestraum." and about the piano, but there are times when my instincts rise above my knowledge, and this seems to be such a moment.

As for the second piece, I really am not a fan of Billy Joel, but this song has a "happy" sound to my ears and some truth to my past, but, mostly, it is one-hundred-eighty degrees on the opposite end of the musical spectrum from "Liebestraum." In this sense, the two contrasting compositions illustrate the beautiful elements of life and the crude elements of life.

The two songs fit in with the theme of my post about "which reality is real?" There are many realities, or, perhaps it is more accurate to say, there are many worlds. Which, if any, of these worlds form reality?

With that, I will await your return to tell me what you think of my words.

Fram Actual said...

I can only speculate, Kaya, but this is what I think must have happened.

When I put up a post, it often takes me another thirty or forty minutes going through it making changes and corrections before I walk away from it. On this particular one, I even came back the next morning and redid the first three or four or five paragraphs. I assume that while I was doing that, you posted a comment, and it vanished when I saved the re-worked piece.

All I can say is that I am sorry if this action inadvertently caused your comment to disappear. I hope you will take the time to leave it again, if you recall it, or to write a new one. Sorry ....

Fram Actual said...

As you see, Kaya, your lost comment is no longer lost. For whatever reason, it was captured and held as "spam." I do not look there very often. I did this evening, and there it was, waiting for me.

In response to your thoughts, one of my points was that it often is impossible to determine what is reality and what is not -- and, if there are multiple layers or levels of reality, to determine which is actual and which is not.

We often think we create our own reality, and some people do exactly that, but, for other people, there is no reality, only wandering here and there searching for it.

As for "The Lessons of History," if you were to ask me to recommend five books for you to read, that would be among them, maybe, even the first one on the list. It is only about a hundred pages, and there is more wisdom offered in it than contained in the Bible.

Another book by Will and Ariel Durant I would include in that list is, "Interpretations of Life."

As for reading, a writer I know (I mean an "actual" writer) once told me he had no time to read anything anymore other than the "old masters." I would suggest you think in those terms, too. I do.

So, thank you, for the smile and the wishes and the hug. You probably were wise not to send a kiss. If you had, you would be entering dangerous country.

Kaya said...

Perfect endings?.... Perhaps, I should think about them again.

"Well, I think there are perfect endings, Kaya. The biggest problem is that when something ends, something else often starts, so the perfect ending might be neglected or forgotten along the way."

That is so true that when something ends, something else often starts.....

Thank you for finding my comment, Fram.

Fram Actual said...

You know there are perfect endings, Kaya. You might be thinking too broadly. Do not tell me you have never experienced a day that, when you went to bed at the end of it, you felt had been perfect? Or, that you have never read a book or seen a film that you did not think had been absolutely perfect at its end?

I still am surprised that your comment had been held back as suspected spam. I did not look there expecting to find it, but simply because I had not looked to see what might be there for some time. Anyway, all is well that ends well.

Bitch said...

AGAIN nice thoughts and beautiful writing..
And about Liszt's "Liebestraum"
is the cherry of the cake.

Try to listen to Frederic Chopin's
Piano Concerto No. 2!!
Blow you a kiss all the way from Athens!!!!

Fram Actual said...

Well, it appears all beautiful young ladies are drawn to Franz Liszt and his magical music. I am glad you like it, Monika, and I am beginning to regret I used Billy Joel and his "You May be Right" as a contrasting piece. The gulf may have been too vast. It is almost like two pieces of music from two different solar systems.

I promise. I will listen to your recommendation by Frederic Chopin before my evening ends.

And, thank you, for the compliment about my thoughts and my writing, and for the kiss from far across the sea.

Anonymous said...

hi hi hi..ok here i am again writing on this place and to you Fram.Enjoying your freetime??i hope you do.

nice post you have here and of course we see the fisher man in the bushes..nice place.did you snap that photo??Good.

I think to be lost is not at all to be lost.who are we that can tell how others feel inside?Or how they are viewing world?

of course there are many worlds and again nothing at all.what do you think you will belive the day when you are about to die?what will you pray?

what what when or..?

is there someone out there?

Lonlieness.i love lonliness.i was born alone and leaves alone..why should i cling to someone only because i "think" i am lonly??

We are not alone at all.Yeah you just ask me and i will show you..remeber ..i am a clairvoiant!!shall i tell you your future fram..wanne hear it??No?!well thats what i though.happily!!

ok sweet thing i leave you know..remeber wall hall!ok!

you can see how much i have visited you..2003000 times?!LOL!!


PsssT..dont belive a word am saying!Iam just having a good time!))


Fram Actual said...

Yes, Anita. I certainly do believe you were having a good time, and you certainly brought a spark of life and laughter to the page with your comment.

You seem to be speaking metaphorically and a bit in riddles and rambling in free thought. In any case, I will specifically answer one question you asked, although I assume you were asking mankind rather than a lone man for a response:

"What do you think you will belive the day when you are about to die? What will you pray?"

To which, I say:

When the time comes, no prayer from me, but, I hope, a shout. A war cry, preferably, or maybe a call to Freyja, just to make certain she hears me approaching her great hall. I am taking no chances, though, and I am superstitious. I already have selected a couple of pistols and a couple of books to be buried with me, and I will rely on my widow (assuming I have one) to make certain a bottle brandy and a few cigars find their way into the coffin with me.

I am sort of disappointed that you have visited my page only two million times. But, with that, I believe you probably hold the record.

And, finally, I do accept kisses from Norway. Thank you, Anita.

Kaya said...

Hello Fram,

I "wrote" this comment in my mind so many times and everything i wanted to say didn't seem thoughtful.

It's about the beauty of being (lost).... Is there two beauties in one or the beauty of being and the beauty of being lost?

Is there actually beauty of being lost? It's so controversial and fascinating. When I am lost I am usually feel some kind of stress, and sometimes I want to find exit from this.

Or is this a metaphor? Anyway, you make me think, ask questions and see life differently. And I am not sure is it healthy for me or not? Just joking. I am very influenced by your blog. You are already noticed it.

Thank you for everything, Fram Actual. For a very thoughtful and interesting comment on my blog, for being a follower on my Russian blog and for being Fram, a talented writer and interesting thinker.


Fram Actual said...

My original thought was the "beauty of being lost," Kaya. A day or two after this post was published, I looked at the title and thought that there really are two distinct pieces here, even though I did not realize it at the time I wrote it. There is beauty to being, which most people recognize and acknowledge, but, for me, there also is such a thing as the beauty of being lost.

Sure, sometimes when we are lost, physically or emotionally, fear, and even panic, are involved. But, in other instances, such as being hopelessly and helplessly in love, there is beauty and magic because we have become "lost" in the reality of another's presence in our lives.

Reality is what we believe it is at the time, at the moment. We can bend it, we can erase it, we can swallow it hook, line and sinker. But, our only actual reality is within us. Usually, we are too busy accepting the reality others are telling us and guiding us along to realize we do not have to march forward in cadence to the commands of others. Go where you want to go, Kaya; do what you want to do.

I am only touching the surface here. There is much more to this notion, but that will come another day .... or not.

Once upon a time, you had about four blogs that I followed. Of those, I think only one remains, but three others have come into existence along the way. Just because I do not follow them all does not mean I do not look in on them at times.

Tim said...

Beautiful - definitely profound. You sound like a fascinating person.

Fram Actual said...

Fascinating is one of my favorite words, Tim, but I have not been using it often these days. I am not certain why. That puzzles me. Something to think about.

In my case -- strange, weird, lost, confused -- might be better words to describe me. How about, "Stranger in a Strange Land," for a description? I visited your blog, and I would guess that you recognize those words from a book title.

Thank you, for coming around and for your comment.

Wind said...

Where there is a reality, there will be a world of fantasy or illusion, too.
I don't really know the boundary between.
Reality can be thin , imagination can be thin also
depends on the perception, sensitivity and limits of each of us.
You can be lost in reality saying that an apple is only
a fruit and nothing else, or you can be lost in yourself
and feel the entire power of perfection in an apple.
I think that would be better to define reality or the meaning
of this word before speaking about.For me, reality is a place
full of facts and actions which are not depending entire on me or
on my will and if one day I will be lost in that neverending
jungle of reality, I will be lost for good, with no chance to return.
You said about Dante Alighieri, and about his nine circles of hell.
'Lasciate ogne speranza, voi ch'intrate' or
'Abandon all hope, you who enter here'
I think we have to pass all the nine circles of hell to understand life
as it truly is. Because the nine circles of Dante
are hidden deep in our souls.
During this passing, we will be lost
in illusion, both hell and heaven.
But I have to define illusion or dream....
Perfect endings? Doesn't exist for me! So, you want me to continue? I need almost a year to explain...

Fram Actual said...

A year would be nice. Two, possibly. Or more.

I feel like I have been rolled over by a tidal wave of thought this morning, Wind. To begin where you stopped, I am not saying a perfect ending exists for everything, simply that it is not difficult to make a perfect shot with a handgun, to read a story that is absolute perfection, to take a photograph that is flawless.

If you do not agree with this, I think that I explained it as best I could in my post and I will not repeat my thoughts again now. And, if you do not agree with this, I am not a fanatic about the concept (or about anything, actually), so I will put the matter to bed after saying one last thing.

This, too, falls into the "one man's xxxx is another man's yyyy" concept. And, when hopes and dreams end, life also ends, and each day becomes mere existence in a meaningless, empty world.

Going to where you began, I think there is a "no man's" land existing between reality and the worlds of fantasy, illusion and imagination (which, essentially are different concepts to me). We all wander around in these elements much of the time.

Concentrating only on imagination, some people say imagination largely ends when childhood ends and the "reality of being an adult" takes control.

Yes, this is true. Most people allow this to happen. It does not have to happen. Most people are more interested in being liked, loved and impressing others than they are in creating their own way of life.

It is impossible to escape the external world completely, but it is possible to construct barriers and shields for self-protection without slipping entirely into an imaginary world.

For instance, I have written that I have canoed in places where civilization does not exist for a few hundred miles in any direction, where you can look into the sky and see no contrails from jet aircraft. In such places, time does not exist except in your mind. It might be any time since the creation of the Earth.

A person can go to such a place and live out his life if he chooses, and a very few do. In a sentence, most of the external forces in a person's life are there because of where he chooses to live and what work he seeks out and what type of family life he creates for himself.

Despite the efforts of "do-gooders" to legislate equality, there is no such thing except, theoretically, in the eyes of the law and, mythologically, in the eyes of god. Too many people try to be something they are not, rather than build on what they are.

This might seem to contradict what I have written in the context of happiness. I have said I am skeptical of those who say they are happy with their lives or who, on a death bed, claim they would not change a thing about their lives. I believe happiness is momentary.

But, there is no contradiction. Happiness and perfect endings come and go. Much about the external reality of life can be kept at a distance. It is a matter of establishing priorities, I think, and being willing to accept the fact we cannot have everything we want all of the time. Pick your priorties and go for them.

I think that basically I am agreeing with what you wrote, Wind, but also saying that the way to avoid being swallowed up by reality is to limit fantasy in your life, limit illusion in your life, but to keep your imagination alive and healthy and well.

For some like me, I never allow either reality or imagination to be greater than fifty percent of my existence.

I guess I could write for a year, too, but enough for now. Thank you, for jolting me awake today, Wind. I am not used to thinking in the morning. It probably was good for me.

Wind said...

Well, I don't know about this fifty percent .... I don't really believe that someone can quantify
or calculate ...maybe yes, a balance between reality and imagination, but again, this equilibrium ( also like perfect endings) doesn't exist.
Only momentary, yes.
We are tortured by this battle for supremacy...usually reality wins.

You cannot be lost forever in her eyes, or into the soul of the river...only if you agree that we have to keep magic (on the first place) in our life . So, imagination is more than fifty percent. Maybe fifty one.

It is like your thesis in the blog's header. Maybe we can find this equilibrium in a point not in a percent. And this point 'comes and goes' or it can't be reached ever, because we get lost in those inner circles.
I need a year...Fram!

Can I write in Romanian?

Wind said...

Ok. Sorry. Your post is about 'the beauty of being (lost)' not about
'how to be lost in a beauty' or
'which is a way for being (lost) '
or whatever...

I will be back! Maybe...
Untill then, have my best regards, Fram!

Fram Actual said...

You might well be right, Wind. Someone (other than me, of course) probably cannot quantify or calculate an exact balance between reality and imagination in which to live their life. Seriously, what I should have said is that I "try," I "attempt," I "struggle" to maintain an equilibrium between the two in my life.

Yes, I see you caught the distinction I was making regarding "the beauty of being (lost)" the second time around.

Certainly, you can write in Romanian here. You might not get an answer, but you are free to write in any language you please.

The next time I decide to write a post, perhaps I could have you translate it into Romanian before I publish it. That might be fun. It would be my first post in a language other than
(e)English. What do you think?

Maddalena said...


We are here too:

Jackson, Mrs Mouse, Frammy Teddy, Mrs Bunny, and many mouses, too...

Anonymous said...


what a wonderful site for discussions!!

Many many hugs and have a great weekend Fram!!))

Fram Actual said...

It appears there must have been a late evening concert or film going on in the outskirts of Warsaw that you and your crew are up and about at this time of the night, Mag.

Whatever the event or occasion, I am glad you found a few moments to stop by and to extend your greetings. You ordinarily seem pretty much invisible these days. Thank you, for coming.

Fram Actual said...

And, here is another who is pretty much invisible these days. Thank you, Anita, for dropping in from wherever to say hello.

Sometimes discussion takes place, but, more often than not, I am preaching to an empty room. Remember, my past advice: Write for yourself. If anyone else reads what you write, so much the better.

Anonymous said...

hihihih..Thanx Fram.You are sooo cute!!))

I will follow your advice!!

Fram Actual said...

All right, Anita. I will take your word for that, on both counts.

Take care ....

Anonymous said...

Thank you Fram.You know i do miss you..but it is getting better every day.

Why dont you come to facebook with us?you can have san fransico there to??

I like, you like strawberriy kisses:)

Wind said...

Hello Anita and Fram!
I have one facebook account for Photographis, and it is the entire world there. It is a easy can make 'friends' and you can lose 'friends' instantly.
Personally, I don't like this facebook, but for my 'Photographis'
for my photographs and my drawings it is a good place for 'buy and sell'.
Only that.Is a huge place where you can 'get lost' without control , saying 'hello' 'beautiful' 'wow'
'like' 'wonderful' 'thanks'..etc...
I don't know why (in my mind) I associate this facebook with a train station (railway station).
People come and go, stay for a while waiting...after that they dissapear cannot keep them linked for what you are or for what you are doing. It is a trade.
If you give 'like' you can get one
back, if you say/comment 'I like what you are doing' you can receive a 'I like what you are doing, too'in exchange.
It is a facile, superficial, easy world of trade, nothing more.
It is my opinion.
What do you think about, Anita, Kaya,and everyone here?
Are you going to 'get lost' in in this 'social spider web'?

Ok. Maybe it is only me!

Anonymous said...

i am to tired to answer properly..but wind,i think things are and will be what you desire it to be.also facebook. i have 100 friends and happy with them.some have 4000 and unhappy. also one thing,you can never run from your faith,whatever road ynu choose to we better relax and enjoy. ourselves and the world.yes i like that saying.goodnight from norway:-)

Anonymous said...

Onee more thing about fb and why i want fram there
.its because one not very often see so much wise sayings anywhere aRound the web as here..and i think more people should read fram..he is a great mentor and inspirator..and of course all his friends

Fram Actual said...

Well, Anita, I am having a hard time maintaining my interest in the sea of blogs right now, so I am not about to go wandering anywhere else on the internet. Prior to arriving here, I have participated in a couple of forums, but they fell into specific categories, such as political issues or, shall we say, outdoor activities.

So, you see, my interest in this sort of thing is very limited. I will explain more about why I would not go to Facebook in my reply to Wind.

As for your later entry about wanting more people to read what I write, I could be doing any number of things and writing any number of places if I were interested in a broader audience. I have written in newspapers with over a million circulation, and, often, there is no way to know if even one person among the million has read what I have written. So, while I am writing on this sea of blogs, I am writing for myself, and, perhaps, for one other person.

Never-the-less, thank you, for your sweet and kind and considerate remark. I appreciate it.

Fram Actual said...

As I am certain you realize by now, Wind, I have very strong opinions about many things and, usually, I am not especially shy about expressing them.

In the case of Facebook, even the name implies superficially. (I wonder if the originators of Facebook realized that when they launched it.) The interpretation and the meaning of words often is very revealing. The selection of words can be, at times, like the subconscious within a person unveiling what the conscious does not wish to reveal.

The face of something is the surface, the exterior, the visible outside. So, what does the name say here? It says nothing more and nothing less than Facebook = "The cover of the book." My purpose for being here among the blogs is to see beyond the cover. I wish to know what people think and feel and believe. A book must be opened and read to learn these things. Conversations must take place.

I would rather have one friend than a thousand acquaintances; I would rather have one reader who finds some meaning in what I write than a thousand who might read my words and are clueless when they have reached the end.

This has been the long way of saying, no, Wind, I will not get lost in the social spider web. I prefer to be "far from the maddening crowd," as Thomas Hardy once wrote.

I could go on, but I think I have made my opinion clear without being overly shy.

Anonymous said...

well yes i do was just a try!!

you could be famous and you know it damn it fram!

but ok..i will continue to come here and read what you all write.It is a pleasure.

Here we have rain and very bad weather..very is only work and read and philosophying!!and music!!

see you!!kiss

Bitch said...

Hello, everyone!
Coming and going to our "Fan club"..
So you can see Fram, this site is
a meeting point for all of us and nobody is getting lost!
It is a joy to read several opinions
in the matter of the blogger-sphere etc.!
At this time I am a bit out of it..
getting bored, first of myself (after almost three years, doing
nothing than saying the same crab)!
Once upon a time I was a real sportswoman in tennis..
After an accident I could not continue..
So I hope this winter going for
another goal like swimming!!!
And reading a lot..
Getting a grip of my English...

I send you all my dearest Wind,
Anita and Fram
many greetings from Greece

Bitch said...

How could I forget my love Kaya!!!
The wonderful girl!!!!!

Kaya said...

Hello everybody!!!!!

Fram, I am waiting and waiting for your new post and every morning I see The Beauty of Being (Lost).

Are you helplessly lost in love or just simply being busy?

About reality. I truly believe that reality is quiet personal thing and that is because of our imagination. Everybody has her or his own reality.

Your reality isn't mine reality. In your reality things are ok and my mind makes the same situation is complicated. That is why we have so much misunderstanding and conflicts in our lives.

I think because we like to judge and assume things we always a little bit distort reality in our imagination. Or sometimes we so much want that things would happen our way that we miss the crucial point in our lives when we should step back and forget about our precious ego and ask the most simple question "Why I am going to do this?" is it my ego which later will bring me into big troubles.

Is really life reality wonderful? Do I really want to be lost in life reality? Yes, I would probably but only for a few hours or I would be bored with the world and myself.

Yes, there is reality and and if we would be able to understand and accept it as it is it would be wonderful. The world would be the most beautiful and peaceful place to live. But it would never happen. The most fragile thing is our mind. The biggest enemy is our mind, The most beautiful thing is our mind. It creates our personal reality.

I am looking forward for your new post, Fram.

I am send to everybody my best wishes!!!!

Fram Actual said...

Well, you have more faith in me than I do, Anita, and who knows? I still have not decided what I want to be when I grow up.

Beyond that, do you recall my "chameleon" posts? I have been at center stage playing a role a few times, but I prefer invisibility and being behind the curtains, moving where and when I want, not leaving a trail behind me. I wish to live many lives and do many things.

Finally, what else is life other than work? Work at a job. Work at a relationship. Work at finding happiness. The trick is to find work you enjoy and, when it becomes boring, find other work.

Fram Actual said...

One person among those who are here is permanently lost, Monika, and that person is me. I wonder. Could it be I am just a bit melodramatic today?

Yes, I also believe there is one person here who could tell you the beauty and the benefits of swimming. It seems to be more than a simple recreational activity for her.

As for reading, there is no better way to learn and to escape from reality and to appreciate the many pathways of living than through reading. Of course, that depends entirely upon what you choose to read.

As for your English, you are doing very well at writing and understanding it. If you get much better, you probably could teach it to a few Americans I know who really could use some help.

Your English is great.

Fram Actual said...

Oh, Kaya. For sure, I am lost. I am lost in the maze of life, love and the pursuit of happiness. Just do not ask me to explain what I mean by that, because every aspect of life is more complicated for me right now than I would like it to be.

I am not certain if this is a semantic difference or what, but my position is that reality is written in stone. We are either married to another, for example, or we are not. We either have blue eyes, or we do not. We either have children, or we do not.

If we know the facts of each other's life, we can know and understand (for the most part) each other's reality.

When we begin to mix things like imagination and fantasy into our lives, it begins to affect our reality in our minds -- but, not reality itself. In a canoe in the wilderness, I can become lost in the sense that I can delude myself into thinking that it is 1811 and not 2011, but I cannot change the reality that actually exists.

A book or a song or another person might allow you to escape your reality and to become lost for a period of time, but it does not change actual reality. Only you can change your reality by changing the physical elements in your life.

When a person finds himself in a reality that is boring or unfulfilling, if he wishes a change he must make decisions which will change the reality he is in and create a new one. The most extreme cases of this are people who run away and "disappear" from their existing lives, and then create an entirely new identity for themselves. There are times I think of doing this.

Anyway, moving right along .... I am superstitious in many respects. Without explaining this further, I will write one more post before October ends, but that will be it for October. I am not ready to return to my reality quite yet.

James said...

I love this post! The first picture just defines the rest of the post perfectly. I agree about how thin reality truly is.

Fram Actual said...

Good, James. Thank you.

The best thing about reality and the worst thing about reality is an identical element of it: It can change in the blink of an eye. Someone dies; your reality changes. You win the lottery; your reality changes. You have too much to drink; your reality changes. You meet a special someone; your reality might change. (It takes two to tango.)

Yep, reality is real, but we have little to no control over it. Thin, indeed.

Anonymous said...

hi fram..what is wrong....?.wish you a nice sunday the way..r you beeing hit by the snow?.just saw it on the news..and when comes the next post?..who wants to live forever is great.bec the nonormalety of peaople.neglects death and live like they shoukd do it forever. to be prepared for death is something we all should think about..and xho wants to live forever when all friends are gone?ok i will go back to my movies..see you fram...

Fram Actual said...

"What is wrong?" she asks.

"Why, Anita, it is October. That is what is wrong," he replies.

No, there is no snow where I am, and none is expected. Most snow in America at the moment is on the East Coast, where people are well adapted to walking knee-deep in something or other.

My next post is but moments away.

As for who wants to live forever, I do, most certainly. I wish to experience as much as I am able, and the only way to do it is to live and live and live.

Something special ....