Tuesday, October 16, 2012

A few words can mean a lot

Johnny Cash once sang a song in which the lyrics went like this:
"How high's the water, mama? Two feet high and risin';

"How high's the water, papa? Two feet high and risin'."
I might imagine these Canada Geese working their way south for the winter have been asking the same question about the Minnesota River, except it appears to be "rising in reverse," so to speak. Since the river bank normally reaches to the larger rocks and the tree line, it is evident that the level of the river was considerably higher last spring than it was when October began and this photograph was taken. Nature rules, so, "Where is the water, mama?"

The art of conducting a conversation


Speaking as a man who, until the past few years, has seldom lived alone during his life, I am not sure why anyone would choose to do so.


When I was a boy, there always were parents and grandparents present. As a young man in college, I usually lived with three or four other young men, and even with a young wife for a while. Wives and children -- along with a couple of "almost wives" -- sort of covers my adult years until 2007. Then came another divorce and, with the exception of a few months in Poland during 2010, no company for me.


Now, since I am alone, I basically talk to myself. Sometimes, there is a two-way conversation. For a while in the latter months of 2010, I found myself using profanity -- usually several words -- in virtually every sentence I spoke when I was by myself. I spoke out loud at times; to myself at other times, but profanity was always there.


As time went on, I began to speak out loud more often while talking with myself, generally employing my version of a "foreign" or American regional accent. A southern inflection or a western drawl are my favorites. Or, I might try a German or a Norwegian brogue, sounding like many "old-timers" around here do as a result of having spoken those languages in their homes as children. For the sake of political correctness, I will stop there.


More recently, I have gone to carrying on the two-way conversations rather than simply speaking out loud. Many, if not most, are in the form of a straight man and a funny man chattering back and forth. Or, I pose a situation which requires resolution and ask myself to find one.


So, the question is, when will these habits stop or, if they do not stop, what will come next? Talking out loud to myself; including much profanity while I speak to myself; carrying on two-way conversations with myself .... what could possibly come next?


Or, the other possibility, of course, is that perhaps I will find another companion -- someone to talk with, to carry on long, wonderful conversations with .... someone to keep me in line.


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17 comments:

Bitch said...

Hi Fram!
I talk only with myself. The funny thing is that I only whisper.
Likely not to disturb anyone around.

The general situation here in Greece is very depressing.
Many people lose their jobs. Pensions will be cut by up to a low.
And despite all these measures, the little man is always dragged to pay more taxes.. Many people here are selling their belongings.
It looks very bad. You can hear .. about suicides.
One wonders if this whole situation is probably one day find a happy ending?
I do not think so...
How poetic gradually becoming lost everything ..

Send you my warmest greetings!

Fram Actual said...

Interesting that you should whisper when you talk to yourself, Monika. I had not thought about it, but I generally speak in my normal tones when I talk to myself. It just occurred to me that I seldom talk to myself when I am outdoors. I wonder why I do not.

What is happening in Greece will happen in much of Europe, I think. And, if Barack Obama is re-elected to the presidency in the U.S., the turmoil and riots will reach here, as well. Socialism might be attractive on paper, but it is untenable in practice. History has proven that over and over again ever since tribal communities gave birth to civilizations. I think you are right that things will continue to get worse before they begin to get better. It will be a challenge to prosper, perhaps even to survive.

Wind said...

Sometimes words are not enough...
We have words all around us : on TV, on internet...in the air...
It depends if this words have a meaning or are only noise,background noise...
Sometimes a companion is only a background of life and yes, it depends what words he/she use....from the heart, from the lips...
We are alone even if we are surrounded by a crowded city...
You will be lucky if you will find the right words from a right person...I wish you luck!

Speaking about our countries,about the system in which we are included ...We have election here in Romania , too.
I am tired about their lies.
We are in the middle of informational war. They play with words, they fight and manipulate with images and words! We live in the Babel tower!
Have a good day! Nice to see you again, Fram!My best regards!


Kaya said...

Once I was told by one person that if I have to learn English I have to talk with myself in English or think in English.

That advice was missing something right from the beginning. Later I realized that talking with yourself is a very intimate conversation. It's intimate when you talk loudly or silently. That is where your insights and your new ideas are born. That when your decisions are formed also.

I think that is very good to carry with yourself two-way conversation. There is only one little problem with it. To make things more clearly you have to hear sometimes the other person's opinion. It gives you different perspective.

I wish you well, Fram.

Fram Actual said...

Often words are never enough, Daliana. A photograph is worth a thousand words, it is said. So, too, is a hand to hold or eyes meet your own or a smile simply given from the happiness of being with one another.

I agree with you. There are too many useless words, too many poisonous words, too many meaningless words. They come from all directions, almost certainly from most politicians and other power-seekers. Sometimes, they come from those closest to us for reasons which make no sense other than that they prefer to hear their own words rather than to listen to the words of anyone else.

It also is said that "sticks and stones can break my bones, but words will never hurt me." Not so. Just as words can lift a spirit, so, too, can they crush a spirit. Words are the most powerful weapons in the world. The question is how they are used, for good or evil, to inspire or to destroy.

Yes, we are in agreement, I think. We ultimately are alone in life and in death, but there is no reason we cannot have a companion to accompany us, someone whose words we actually hear and who really listens to our words. Yes, and it takes great luck to find this special someone.

Fram Actual said...

I have tried to remember if I talked out loud to myself before the past few years. I cannot recall ever having done it until recently. My words always flowed silently through my mind. The thinking process, I mean. Neither can I recall carrying on a two-way conversation with myself, either out loud or silently, until recently.

I am not certain, Kaya, if this reflects the difference between having or not having a true companion to talk with and to share feelings and emotions and secrets with, or if this change is something which would be evolving inside me with or without a companion. It scares me a little bit to think this two-way conversation might, theoretically, increase to a three-way discussion. Can you imagine leading a group discussion? In your mind? Out loud?

What can I say? It might be interesting.

You are right, though. It takes someone else, another person, preferably a trusted companion, to offer a different perspective. Whether I am carrying on a two-way or a three-way chat with myself, the same education and experience are guiding the conversation.

Well, probably, anyway ....

ANITA said...

Goodmorning Fram.First.Thank you for Bach music.I have been looking for that suite for a long time.It iz beautiful.
About talking to myself.I dont do that loud.I never had.But inside me.i have a lot of discussions.Yes.With friends.God.Devel.Angles animals Birds.You name it.
I use swear words only when i hurt myself..
It is interesting to read about what all you others do..I quess that is whta makes us humans soo special.We are all different.Thinks different and yet the same.

I think.For me,-the Great Vikings laws is what i try to rule my life.

Viking Laws!
Be brave and agressive
Be direct
Grab all opportunities
Use varying methods of attack
Attack one target at a time
Don't plan everything in detail
Use top quality weapons
Be prepared
Keep weapons in good condition
Keep in shape
Find good battle comrades
Agreeon important points
Choose one chief
Be a good merchant
Find out what the market needs
Don't promise what you can't keep
Don't demand overpayment
Arrange thihgs so that you can return
Keep the camp in order
Keep things tidy and organized
Arrange enjoyable activities which strengthen the group
Make sure everybody does useful work
Consult all members of the group for advice

To all of you in here.Have a great day!!

Fram Actual said...

How much or how little a person talks to himself often depends upon how much or how little he talks to others, I think, which means whether or not a person lives alone might be the most relevant ingredient in the mix.

Just wait until your son is grown and gone, Anita, and you might find your habits changing in regard to talking to yourself.

I am not familiar with your "Viking Laws." My own "laws" are more in tune with the "wisdoms" given in the "Prose Edda:"

"He must early go forth
who fain the blood
Or the goods of another would get;
The wolf that lies idle
shall win little meat,
Or the sleeping man success."

ANITA said...

ohh thanx!!that was a great poem!

yeah..my son..is beginning to have a mans voice..a mans smell..a mans body..yet..he is still a little child..and he loves to be kissed and he loves the cosyness of home!What more s greater then that..to give a child a good childhood!thanx for not forgetting about my son..you know he is the biggest part of my life...Yes..what will happen when he is out the doodr..a new life for me?i dont know...

Iam soo glad you are back fram...

Have a good weekend!

http://youtu.be/hAYSIgXj2ZY

Smareis said...

Olá Fram Actual,

Depois de um tempinho ausente aqui estou pra matar a saudades...
Adorei postagem e concordo com você,algumas palavras podem ter muita importância e significar muito.
Por vezes falar em voz alta, eu por vezes faço também, e bem engraçada as vezes.Conversar com alguém também é muito importante.

Deixo um grande abraço, com desejo de uma ótima semana!
Beijos!

Fram Actual said...

The poem is there because Snorri Sturluson once lived, Anita. If it were not for him, so much of the Old Norse wisdom and stories and myths and beliefs and religion would have been lost to history. He is one of a very few men from the past I would give a great deal to have known. The "Prose Edda" is next to the Bible on my book shelf, and this has nothing to do with faith.

My childhood was marvelous for the most part, and for that I am grateful beyond words. If you are lucky, your son will feel the same way some day. And, when he is out your door, you will begin a new life yourself.

Well, back, sort of. I do not plan to "live" here as I sometimes have done, and, undoubtedly I will be absent days at a time without even stopping by for a look at my blog or the blogs of others. My life continues to change, and I do not know yet what my next incarnation/persona will be. I might be too old to be Peter Pan, but there is no reason not to try to be him and to continue searching for my own Neverland.

Fram Actual said...

It appears Smareis has returned to the sea of blogs, as well. It is nice your voyage has brought you this way once again.

Words are more precious than diamonds, more dangerous than bullets, more holy than any relic of any life, I think. They can bring happiness to us or desolation to our souls. They can last longer than any man or woman who utters them. All right, I will stop now; you get my drift.

It is enjoyable to hear people talking to themselves. It reveals a part of them which might never be known any other way. Be careful, Smareis, I might be listening to you as you talk to yourself.

Thank you, for the hug and the kisses. They are rare in my world these days. And your week, too. May it be marvelous.

ANITA said...

well..so iz life Fram..what you give you shall recive.

Thanx for coment back.May you have a good week as well :)

Fram Actual said...

I am not so sure I agree with you on that one, Anita. Giving and receiving, I mean. I am in "life is but a dream" mode right now. Which means, reality is what you dream it.

See you around ....

ANITA said...

hah!I thought you would comment on that one!I could hear you not agreeing with me hahahahaha!

well.ido agree it do not always funck. :)
i am in this mood.
if you want money.you have to work:)and if there is no work.create a work!
it is a long time since i have left the belive you are what you think..i mean..Be what you are..and dont think so much...life is to short for that..thinking and thinking!
and so.if you have nothing to say or share to the world..dont do it!(i mean there is to much nonsense speading around on the web..)And i take your advise not blog soo much..but blog when i have something to say and share!

uff this was a long morning message..have a good day fram!))

Fram Actual said...

Sure, post when you wish, when your mood is right, when you have something to say or whatever. And, it is true I have not had much that I wished to say in recent times.

But, Anita, what I was mostly trying to say before is that once upon a time I came here almost every day. I have not been like that for a while. There have been times when I have not been here for a week or longer because I am doing other things or involved in other projects or work or whatever. So, I do not always see comments left here or the posts of others in a timely manner.

And, my life is in the process of undergoing significant changes. As I said to someone a few days ago, for the first time in two years I can see the light at the end of the proverbial tunnel.

ANITA said...

If you say so.I belive you.
And i am very happy for you!
For me.I got plans to stay:)

Ok see you next time you post then!
Greetings from Norway!

Something special ....