Tuesday, April 14, 2009

Hi there, my name is Billy Pilgrim

Have you looked out of your window recently?

Welcome to the planet Tralfamadore ....

I know I have mentioned that I really enjoyed growing up in a small town setting, and that I once wished I could be age 11 forever. (Now, now, now.) Around town, Fram the First and I often were referred to as the Fram boys. A few people confused us with La Framboise, who lived a few blocks away, but that never was a big problem.

I’m sorry. I’ve just got to stop doing this. I start out by telling you that Fram the First is my ancestor. Then, I am the reincarnation of Fram the First. Next, Fram the First and I grew up together, playing our fiddles and dancing in the streets. I would imagine a few of you by now are asking, is this guy losing it or what?

Yes, I’m sorry. Remember, a few days ago I said I was revealing too many personal details about my life? Well, I've been trying to confuse everyone since then just to throw you off course. I apologize.

Actually, none of these scenarios is real. Actually, none of what you think you are experiencing at this moment is real, either. You all are in a drug-induced state and have been abducted by aliens. Didn't notice that your breakfast this morning tasted a little funny, did you?

You are being transported to the planet Tralfamadore, where you will be met by Billy Pilgrim. He will assign you to a residence hall, and from there you are on your own until orientation tomorrow. Good luck, and please wake me when we arrive.

Music Note: Listening to Cheap Trick ....
Specifically, "The Greatest Hits" ....
Some Lines from "Surrender:"

Mommy's alright, Daddy's alright, they just seem a little weird.

Surrender, surrender, but don't give yourself away, ay, ay, ay.

Whatever happened to all this season's losers of the year?
Ev'ry time I got to thinking, where'd they disappear?
When I woke up, Mom and Dad are rolling on the couch.
Rolling numbers, rock and rolling, got my Kiss records out.

Mommy's alright, Daddy's alright, they just seem a little weird.
Surrender, surrender, but don't give yourself away, ay, ay, ay.

Away.
Away.

12 comments:

TheChicGeek said...

Beam me up, Scotty :) LOL!

Fram Actual said...

Aye, aye, Admiral Kelly ....

Angie said...

Oh my god! The scientologists were right! The Mormons are gonna be so pissed . . .

Katy said...

Could I just put a request in to the chief drug dispenser at alien high command that they stop including work-related hallucinations in my daily dose? Thank you.

Fram Actual said...

Hey, Angie. Tom Cruise said to tell you, hello, and that he'll save you a seat on the next flight.

Fram Actual said...

I'm not sure they'll listen to me, Katy. There's something weird about these guys. They're not normal .... like we are.

Rachael Cassidy said...

It's always about perception, isn't it, Fram??!!! :)

Had a talk about perception at work the other night. My perception is my truth, regardless of intent. hmmmmm........

Fram Actual said...

Yes, yes, yes and yes, Rachael. A thousand times, yes.

Perception. Yours, mine and the other people standing in the room at a given moment in time. What you know, believe, think, feel when you see me or the person standing next to me; whether you can see inside me, or through me, or stop cold at the surface of me; whether you actually listen to what I say, actually read what I write, whether you can identify with me through common experience -- so very many factors which come down to one thing: perception, yours, mine and the other people standing in the room at a given moment in time.

Thank you, for coming and for writing a comment.

Natalie said...

“…I was revealing too many personal details about my life” – Hmmmm, let me see… What do I know about you? - you don’t like jokes from TX & can’t stand Bill Maher!!!

Fram Actual said...

See how much you know about me, Natalie? Lots more, too, I am sure.

You are right on those two points. I never have been a fan of off-color jokes, and I do not like Bill Maher's politics. I also think he is more of a "cheap shot" artist than a real comedian, which puts him the category of a phony to me.

Other than that, how is it going? Are you enjoying our flight to Tralfamadore?

A Cuban In London said...

Fram the First is a spy and I want my fiver, please! MI5 is after him as well as the Interpol. He dresses in big, massive overcoats and wears sunglass at night (no, I'm not singing!). Last time I saw him was on the Michael Jackson's video, Billy Jean. He was still chasing the ghost. Twenty years later, he still can't recognise Michael. Well, nobody can.

Greetings from London.

Fram Actual said...

And you are one foxy gentleman, CiL.

How did you know Fram the First was on the trail of SMERSH agents, and that trail led right through the casinos of Monaco today while on his way to Royale-les-Eaux in France in pursuit of Monsieur Le Chiffre? We can only hope Fram can outdistance that James Bond fellow, or he might have to take up a new line of work and miss out on being the hero of books and movies.

Quickly now, CiL. You drive while I look for the Michael Jackson video.

Something special ....